Ten on Tuesday 

1.  It is been a few years since posting, but I am still so very happy.  I am now engaged to Shane (who'da thunk it right??), and all three of our kids are happy, healthy, and doing well.  We both love our jobs for the first time in a long time, and we can really take a breath and relax every now and then (something we haven't done before).

2.  Our son, Noah, is halfway through his enlistment with the US Marines.  I feel that the time has gone by extremely fast on some days, and on other days it feels like he's been gone a decade.  We all miss him terribly and his leave time is never enough time.  He is happy right now, has a great girlfriend that we adore, and is counting down the days to his next visit.  

3.  Our daughter, Hannah, is in a job she really enjoys, and is very good at.  She's healthy, happy, and so independent it's insane.  She still lives at home to save money, but I feel her days at home are numbered.  She and her boyfriend, Paedin, have big plans to move south in a few years, and once she sets her mind to something, it gets done (*sniff*sniff*).  She and I have been spending a lot more time together which I adore, she is truly one of my best friends.

4.  Our son, Connor, is doing great.  He is currently the manager at his restaurant and is living in a house with three of his best friends.  He just bought his first "nice" car on his own, and is really buckling down to save for his future.  Although he moved out earlier this year, he still comes home a few times a week, just to make mom happy :).

5.  We lost a family member last October.  Tucker was twelve, almost thirteen when he decided it was his time to leave.  He was surrounded by ALL of us, and we each had our own time with him before he went to sleep one last time.  It is something I was never prepared for, he was always so healthy and happy.  It was actually one of the hardest days of my life saying goodbye to my best friend, but I know that he had a great life and was loved more than anything.  Ayla was visibly sad for quite a while after we lost Tucker, she would wander the house and look in all of his hiding places.  She wasn't quick to give love like she had been, she stopped eating, she was just plain sad.  She perked up a little when we got her two baby brothers though.....

6.  In January we gained two new family members.  Moose and StanLee are two Catahoula Leopard dogs that joined our family with a bang.  We had only adopted Moose, but StanLee's person pulled out at the eleventh hour and they had no one to foster/adopt him so we stepped up.  That was the best decision it turns out, as they are inseparable and have kind of trained each other.  They are tanks, at only 7 months they each weigh about 65 pounds (and growing) and they are full of love, happiness, and curiosity.  Ayla tolerates them, even plays with them sometimes, but is always sure to remind them who the queen of the family is.

7. My job is great!  I am still working with the IDD population, and love every minute of it.  I have way more paperwork to do than I would like, but I get to break out of the office whenever I want to go and visit the rooms and workshop.  The people we support here make my day every day, shouldn't all jobs be like that????  Shane has finally found his "home" for a job, he's the assistant executive chef at a cidery close to home and has a smile on his face every time he comes home.  He loves who he works with, he loves what he does, and I benefit because he practices his new dishes on us--I haven't cooked in months, lol.

8.  How do you plan a wedding when you're close to 50 years old???  We definitely do not want a large wedding, but we both have big families.  We are thinking small ceremony and then a big party right afterwards.  We also then think of taking the kids on a cruise, getting married, and coming back to tell everyone it's already done!!  I am so excited to be marrying my best friend, I just wish it hadn't taken us so long to find one another.

9.  Why is it "Ten on Tuesday"...just because of the "T's"?  I don't have ten things to write about today....

10.  Ok, so that sums up our lives for right now.  Our kids are now adults (gasp), we are getting married, we have three crazy dogs,  jobs we love, and an amazing family.  What more could a girl ask for????

So very happy....

                                                                Some good lookin kids!

                                                            Connor's senior picture, 2018

                                                          Hannah's senior picture, 2020

Noah's senior picture, 2018

                                                          The BEST dog ever.....Tucker

                                                      Best friends for life....Tucker & Ayla

                                             The new boys on our block....Moose & StanLee

                                                              One very happy family!!!

Welcome Back!!!

Holy Mother of Murphy I've been away from this for too long!!!  Life has been an absolute rollercoaster since I last posted, I don't even know where to start....here goes:

Three years ago we "adopted" another child, Noah, one of Connor's best friends.  His mom fell on some hard times (we've all been there) so he came to live with us for a little bit.  That little bit turned into forever and he is definitely one of ours now.  He and Connor are the definition of unbiological twins--they graduated together, went to college together, left college together, worked at the same place together, but last year he took his own step and became a United States Marine.  He is on base in North Carolina, getting ready for a deployment this coming spring.  We have not seen him since Christmas, but we just got a surprise that he will be home next Friday for a little over two weeks....can't wait to see him!  We are so proud of him and are looking forward to his future.

Connor graduated from high school (I know, I don't look like I could have a kid that old, lol) in 2008, went to FLCC for a semester and decided that college was not for him.  He moved home and got a full time job at his old stomping ground, where he has worked since and is in the running for the next manager position.  He's working on figuring out what he wants to do with his life, unsure about school, trade, etc.  We are so very proud of him for knowing what he doesn't want and having the confidence to tell us and be open to whatever & wherever life directs him.  We cannot wait to see what his next step will be!

Hannah spent half of her senior year in the pandemic that is the Corona Virus, so needless to say her senior year was less than celebratory.  She was home from March on until June with distance learning, but she did graduate!  The ceremony was unusual, it was just her, walking alone on stage, with a small group of us standing in the auditorium cheering her on.  Not the ceremony we had all planned on, but i was no less excited and proud of her.  She missed out on her senior breakfast, the senior picninc, the senior ball, and a graduation party, but she did get to spend some quality time with her family (no trade off there!!) and is more than ready to move on with her life.  As we are still in the midst of the pandemic, she will not begin classes until (hopefully) January when they are in person and not all online (damn Rona).  She will be taking courses to be a dental assistant, a career she can have in almost any state she chooses, so it's a really good thing!

What else.....I have a new job, I work at a school that also has an adult program for adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities that I work with....and I LOVE IT!!  It is a small program (but growing) and my position is a new one, so we are creating as we go.  I work with my former supervisor (we make a great team) and have some great coworkers.  The position suits me as I get to do a little of the office background work as well as visit with the people we support--best of both worlds!

I've been going through some health issues myself, my memory is not nearly what it was, and I have been having migraines, body aches, and "hot flashes" that just won't quit.  Sounds like menopause, I know, but I'm a little young for that my doc's think.  They tell me it's probably stress related and that I may just have too much going on--well who doesn't??  My memory is getting more scattered every day, I have even had a few instances where I'm driving on a road that I've been driving on for 15 years, and suddenlyI  forget where I am and do not recognize anything (they only last a second or two, but they're not fun).  I can have a conversation and the next day not even know I was involved in it.  I have watched a movie with Shane, and two weeks later I want to rent it because I've never seen it.....ugh!!!  The silver lining on that is I'm a cheap date....we can buy a movie and every month it's like I'm watching a new one!  I'm hoping it is just a glitch and not early Alzheimer's or anything like that.  It's pretty scary to be honest.  Cross your fingers for me, at least I'm trying to have a great sense of humor about it!!

Shane is doing well, he is working as a chef and loves what he does and who he works with, win-win.  We had a minor setback in November of 2018 in that he received a DWI and was sentenced to 3 months in jail and 5 months probation.  This put a huge amount of stress on our relationship, I wasn't totally confident that we could survive it.  I became a single mom for the second time in my life, and it was harder emotionally than the first time!  I did bounce right back into the role however, and the kids and I spent a lot of time together learning how to manage our "temporary life."  Shane's family was incredibly supportive, I could not have asked for better people to help me see the light at the end of the tunnel (and help me get through that dark tunnel), I am so very appreciative and lucky.  My family was less than  supportive, but we have grown apart these past few years, so I was not shocked.  It was an extremely hard three months for all five of us, but we made it through.  Once he came home, we had a lot of relearning to do, and he had to get his life in order, but he's done really well and we are all doing pretty good.  Thankfully both of our families were very supportive of him when he came home, which has helped immensly.  Shane will be celebrating 21 months sober next week and we could not be more proud of him.  

Shane's family has grown a ton over the past few years...his brother got married and had a beautiful baby girl, his sister got engaged and is to be married next week, and his youngest brother also got engaged to be married next year.  We are now a family of 15, not a small quiet bunch!!  Everyone gets along amazingly (for the most part, lol) and it's the most fun group.  Dad had a health scare last summer, he had a heart attack and double bypass surgery.  He is a tough trooper though and is doing amazingly after recovery and rehab, looking forward to many more years with him.  Mom has had her own health issues, some they are currently working to resolve and the outlook is very promising.

Big Grandma passed last summer---she was ready, but we weren't.  It was hard to say goodbye, I never knew my biological grandparents so she and Big Grandpa were the only ones I had in my life and now they're gone.  I enjoy talking about them a lot with the kids and remembering all of the laughs we had with them.

That pretty much catches us up.  I am hoping to start blogging at least once a week again, it was a great way for me to remember what's been going on in our lives.  Until next time.....

Happy New Year!!!  This has been THE best year so far.  I absolutely LOVE my job.  I have never been able to honestly say that.  I get up every morning looking forward to going in to work, and once there I love being there. 
This is the first job I've had where my coworkers are genuine, honest, and up front, and I am loving it. I did enjoy my previous job, but after spending three months in my new position, I am realizing what a joke my old department was. I am making a difference in my job now, and that makes me happier than ever.

Well Hot Damn.....

It's been four months and something has changed...I GOT A JOB!!!  And...I ended up exactly where I think I am meant to be.  I accepted a position working for the ARC of Monroe, the same company that gave me my first job opportunity after I graduated college.  I have always wanted to get back into this field, the timing was perfect and it just, worked.  If you know me, you know not much "just works" for me in this life, so this was a welcome surprise.  Someone during orientation this past week said, "Welcome Home!!" and that is exactly how I feel with this position, at home.

My kiddos are exstatic that I am heading back to work as well.  Not only because they will now have a little freedom after school before I get home, but because the tension in the house has almost disappeared.  I have ADHD, so it is not in my nature to sit and do nothing--it actually makes me cranky.  Since I left the U of R back in April, sitting at home is what I did most days.  Being home every day all day, with the anxiety attacks, along with not having a job, has made me a not-so-fun mama/girlfriend these past few months.  I am happy to say that I have not had an anxiety attack in over two months, and my stress is really no different than anyone elses I think, basic.  Our house is now a much happier place to be.

I feel like I haven't been this happy in years.  It seems like everything is going to be ok.  My kids are both healthy and happy, I am excited and looking forward to the challenge of this job, and my heart is very happy in my relationship.  This is the first Christmas that I can really say I have everything I ever wanted......

Merry Christmas!!

What's Up Wednesday
Why do I feel that all my posts need snappy titles?  Lol

So we are moved in to the new place....still a ton of boxes left to unpack...I have lost motivation though.  I love our new house, I just feel like there might not be enough room for all of our "stuff."  Time to really clean house, and simplify.

We bought a new-to-us camper.   I love it, we will have a lot more space when we all are there, and there is a lot more storage so we won't be falling over our camping supplies.  It's a bummer though that we bought it last weekend and we can't use it now until next season :(.  Something to look forward to I guess...

Job hunting is still in process, I have two very promising interviews this week though, so keep your fingers crossed for me.  I really need to get out of this house.  I think getting back to a normal life where I'm doing a million things at once will be so much better for me.  This being at home every day, all day is slowly killing me....

I love this season.  I love the chill in the air, the leaves changing colors, the smell of candles burning in the house, and everything pumpkin.  Fall is my all time favorite season and we are in the middle of it, that makes me extremely happy!!!!!

Thoughts on Thursday:

I HATE moving, seriously, I despise it.  Next time I will be getting packers and movers and let them worry about everything.  It was of course the hottest day of the year the day we moved--perfect right??  We have been in the new house for one week tomorrow and I still feel out of sorts and chaotic.   I swear the boxes left to unpack multiply at night while we sleep.  We still need to get some little things out of the old place, hopefully once that is done I will feel less on edge.

My kids are growing up too fast.  My first born just started his Sophmore year, and my baby began her eight grade year this week.  They have grown into sensitive, caring, respectful, hilarious, witty young adults, it's just happening too fast for me.  They just left the house to walk to the grocery store (about a mile away) together, and it was no big deal to them.  To me, it means the world that they love spending time together, and their independence is mind-boggling.

I have an interview tomorrow and I am scared shitless.  It's with a company I know a little about, doing something I've never done.  I am keeping my fingers crossed as it could be a fun job (they sought me out), but I really need to get back on the job search train and find a job...wish me luck!!

There is nothing good on TV at the moment.  I am watching "Gone in Sixty Seconds" for the millionth time, yet I still find it amazing that they get all the cars in time.  Does this kind of thing ever really happen?

I am looking forward to hopefully going to the Celtic Festival this weekend.  I went a few times to the one held in Syracuse and had a great time.  Hoping to hear some good music, eat some good food, and do a lot of people watching.

My kid brother is having surgery right now on his tear duct.  I am typically overly emotional about things, but I am rather calm about this (maybe it's the meds, lol).  I have been thinking about him all day though, missing him.  I hope all goes well and that the doctors are able to correct the collapsed duct and he will be good as new in the morning.....please keep him in your thoughts.

Ten on Tuesday

1.  Job hunting sucks....but I'm still trying to keep my chin up

2.  We are moving!!!  We found an amazing house in a better neighborhood, I cannot wait!

3.  We have two weeks to pack and move--yep, two weeks, talk about chaotic

4.  I have had two anxiety attack--free days in a row now, wahoo!!!!!

5.  My kids can be complete smart-asses, but they are funny as hell

6.  I am starting the "CizeItUp" program with my girlfriend and would be lying if I didn't say I am intimidated

7.  My puppy Ayla is deaf, which is making it a pain in the ass to train her, but I love her more every day

8.  I think my older dog Tucker is secretly mad at me for bringing the puppy home six months ago, I'm not sure if he'll ever forgive me.....

9.  We have a TV in our bedroom and I am considering not having it in our new bedroom when we move....I haven't mentioned this yet, we'll see how it goes, lol

10.  I am being much more honest on this blog than I was on my first...not that I ever lied on that blog, but it seems like it was all "everything is amazing and wonderful and there are no problems ever" all the time, when it was most definitely not all the time....